Connect the Dots

defiance defiant parenting parenting myths parenting styles strong-willed kids warmth Feb 01, 2022
Connect the Dots

Last week, we mentioned that allowing consequences is a better way to improve behavior instead of punishment. We also mentioned the guiding principle of consequences-- that it should teach the natural outcome of a choice.

When we let our kids experience the natural effect of their choices, it starts to connect some dots in their brains. 

Picture a blank dot-to-dot game, one of those ones that go up to the number 1,000.  It would be difficult to figure out what the image is if you don’t connect the dots.

Life is like a big dot-to-dot game.  It’s complex and hard to figure out unless you have an opportunity to learn what the rules of the game are and you start connecting the dots.

If we guide our kids, starting with the first dot, they will gradually start connecting the dots themselves. After a while, they will be able to tell you what the image was. 

The way that our brains work is that we develop new neurons when we have new experiences. The more we use these neurons, the easier it becomes to use them. So the more our kids are exposed to the outcomes of their choices, the more they are trained to connect the dots effectively.

Allow your kid to experience the outcomes of their choices.  It will teach them better than any of your lectures ever will. Learn more about this in our free parenting class.

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