The 1st C of How Boundaries Work

defiance defiant parenting parenting myths parenting styles strong-willed kids warmth Oct 26, 2021
The 1st C of How Boundaries Work

When we teach parents about boundaries, we like to teach that they need to remember the 3 C’s.

Create Boundaries
Communicate Clearly
Carry Out Consistently

Today, we’re going to talk about the first C.

C - Create boundaries

Once you identify the limits for safety and as you begin to pay attention to the internal alarm systems at home, you’ll start to know what boundaries need to be created.

Just a quick reminder: We are not creating all sorts of boundaries to restrict our kids’ freedom and to rob them of any control over their life.

What we want to establish here are boundaries that are about safety and responsibility.

What do we aim for creating these boundaries?

  • To keep our home feel safe, peaceful, and happy for each individual
  • To teach our kids respect and responsibility

We want to let you know that this isn’t a walk in the park. Even after all these years, I still wrestle with boundaries, especially with trying to decide which ones I should and shouldn't set. So if you find yourself struggling over this as you start, know that it’s perfectly normal and that you are not alone. What is important is that you check in with yourself as you go. 

The trick here is to really think about the health, happiness, and safety of your kids but balance that with freedom of choice so they develop the ability to choose things for themselves and experience the outcomes of those choices.

After you start to create boundaries, you will need to move onto the next C: Communicate Clearly.  We’ll discuss that next.

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